Showing posts with label coping. Show all posts
Showing posts with label coping. Show all posts

Friday, March 25, 2011

Support

Challenge #14, I Walk the Line
This week's Walk the Line Diva Challenge really fits in well with the topic of support and support groups. And I'm talking about support for the caregivers, especially, because it does feel sometimes like you're all alone. Presumably, your loved one is getting the support he or she needs in treatment programs, counseling, or with a psychiatrist. Well, that's not entirely true, because sometimes we can't convince our loved one that something is wrong that they even need support for.

I think we all need support. The sufferers of mental illness and their loved ones and caregivers. [Well, I think everyone could benefit from a little therapy, but that's a topic for another post.]
I've participated in 3 support groups. The first one I attended was a Survivors of Suicide group that I found some time after my father had committed suicide in January of 1991. I can't remember how soon after it happened that I found this group, but I had tried a couple of therapists, without any success in dealing with my anger and grief. Probably because I'm really good at the "nothing's really wrong... I'm fine" way of dealing with things. In the group though, I discovered it much easier to talk about my feelings or even just feel my feelings after hearing others do the same.

Now, I'm currently attending two different groups, though the first is not really a support group, per se, but a class to educate the members of the group about mental illness. The is a course sponsored by NAMI, and is the Family to Family Education program which lasts 12 weeks. This weekend will be our last class, and I'll be sorry to see it end, but feel like we made a connection with at least one of the families and I hope that we'll be able to keep in touch.

Finally, we're attending a group called the Support, Training and Education Program (STEP), held at the facility where Brian is currently receiving treatment. This is a 2 hour weekly meeting, with the first hour dedicated to a speaker or some kind of specific topic, and the second hour is support. The majority of the participants have a loved one at the facility, but not always. This group has been invaluable to our own self care, and we have at least tried out many of the suggestions we've learned about on those evenings.

Mental illness sufferers do have community support groups, and Brian attends one that meets bimonthly. He doesn't say much about it, but I'm glad that he is going. Not all groups are created equal, of course, so finding one that works for you is important, but they are definitely a useful tool in your coping skills toolbox.

Holding out a hand,




Monday, March 14, 2011

Coping


A crisis arises, and you deal with it. What happens after the crisis is no longer acute, but the aftereffects remain? That's when you must figure out how to cope. I know that everyone copes with things differently, but it can still come as quite a shock that your family members don't do things the way you do, or the way you expect them to. Nevertheless, there were some common things that we turned to initially. By we, I mean, husband John and myself.

The first thing we did, was turn to books. OK, that's not entirely true. John wanted to make sure we had a diagnosis for Brian before he started investing. You know, he wanted the right subject to be concentrating on. And also, Brian's hospitalization was a week before Christmas, so we tried to muster up as much holiday spirit as we could, giving it until the new year to let it all sink in, and then we could start fresh.

If that sounds like we were all together, coping well, like one big happy family, that would not quite be accurate, but in our family we do seem to have a lock on putting on a good face. The bottom line though, in the back of our minds through the holidays, was that we must educate ourselves as much as we can, and get Brian in the best treatment plan possible.

That's really all I have to say about coping today. John and I plan to review the books we read, and the classes and support groups that we have attended, and may attend in the future. So stick around for that, and to check out more of the updates as I fill in the blog with more information. Links, other blogs, resources... that kind of thing.


 Hanging in there,